Rebecca Williams Photography
Mr. Man is always so serious when he is around other kids, but the exact opposite for the family. His sister is such a ham and often steals the spotlight when I have the camera, so I was very happy to get these shots of him playing in the sprinkler a few weeks ago.
Recently, I have engaged in a heart-wrenching, emotional process – selecting images for the Certified Professional Photographer Image Submission. Two years ago I set a goal for myself to become certified, and last year I determined that 2011 was the year. Well, 2011 flew by and I was no closer to my goal, so this year, I actually declared my candidacy. Consisting of two parts, a 100 question written exam and a 15 image submission for review by a board, the CPP process did not tremendously worry me. After all, I know about lighting, and styling, and posing. I have been in business for six years – no big deal, right? WRONG!! Turns out that finding “near perfect” images is a very difficult task. The light must be directional. The pose must be spot on. There must be separation from the background. There must be NO mixing of color keys. As I am submitting images for critique, I am learning how attached I am to my images. I looked through thousands of images and selected my very best, and the critics tear them apart! It makes me question myself as a photographer and is a HUGE blow to my ego. Admittedly, I was unprepared for the first onslaught. I stepped away from the computer and cried when I read the comments. My husband asked why I was putting myself through this. My 11 year old said, “They don’t know what they’re talking about – you take the most awesome pictures in the world!” This made me start thinking. Why am I doing this to myself? I do take pretty kick-ass portraits. My clients love them, I love them, so why bother with this certification thing?
I have always had a need to excel – to be the best. Driven by competition (usually with myself), I find myself in a constant race to learn more, do better, update processes. In every aspect of my life this is true. For homeschooling, I am constantly looking for new approaches or new curricula. We will be in this house for another year, but already I am thinking about ways to make the move more efficient and expedited, so that I will be READY! When I was in college, I was the only one of my classmates who took all SEVEN exams to become a Microsoft Certified Systems Engineer. Why? Because I knew this certification would set me apart from other job seekers. It would not only show that I knew the “Microsoft Sanctioned” way of doing things, but that I did something that the other students had not. It also proved to me that I was the best. I needed that piece of paper. This extra step landed me my first job. The hiring manager told me that because I already had this certification it showed him that I was willing to go above and beyond what was required, and he was my champion and is the reason I was hired. Did the company follow the “Microsoft Sanctioned” methods? No way! But I was seen as a resource when something went wrong. I was looked to for my knowledge and although we didn’t use all of the methods, I was seen as an expert.
Naturally, it just makes sense that I pursue the Certified Professional Photographer certification. Already, in just the two weeks I’ve been submitting images for critique, I’ve learned so much more about portraiture. I’ve learned how to “see” a perfect portrait. I’ve learned that the hands have to be “just so” for a complete portrait. I’ve learned that a “kicker” is essential to the classic portrait. I’ve learned that the subject in a traditional portrait is NEVER in the center of the frame. I’ve learned that the traditional portrait probably didn’t take into account an 18 month old. I’ve learned that spontaneity is one of my strong points. I’ve learned that I would rather capture a hearty laugh than a perfectly lighted face. I’ve learned that I will not always practice the “perfect portrait” rules. However, I will use what I’ve learned. I will teach what I’ve learned. I will constantly drive myself to become a better photographer. Always. Do I need the certification? No – my clients love me, and I love them. I capture amazing images of their kids through an unforgettable experience culminating in cookies. No, I don’t need it. But I really want it, and I’m going to keep going back for more until I have 15 near perfect portraits, and unmeasurable lessons learned that I will fall back on for the rest of my life.
A couple of months ago I was added to a military spouse photographer networking group on facebook. Immediately, someone suggested a blog circle, and a few of us thought that was a fantastic idea! Designed to force photographers to focus on a personal project, a blog circle consists of several photographers. Each photographer takes a given theme, interprets it through images, and creates a blog post with those images. The post also includes a link to the next photographer’s blog, so it gives readers an interesting perspective on how different photographers can see topics so differently. Our first topic is “A Day in the Life” and, because my life is pretty boring, so is my post, but I think it captures an accurate portrayal. 🙂 I am going to try to do my posts with no explanation of the images, because I’m trying to become a better storyteller with photos. Enjoy!
Of course, these were not all taken on the same day (I’m not that talented)! I hope you enjoyed the post, and will check out all of the photographers’ images, starting with Serena Nicole!
Technical Note: For these images I used: Canon 7D body, Canon 5D Mark II body, Canon 85mm f/1.8 lens, Canon 50mm f/1.4 lens, Canon 70-200mm f/2.8 lens. Post processing included levels adjustments for a few (sunrise, path images), black and white gradient, and sharpening for the web.
When I was tucking my snugglebug into bed last Thursday, I reached to close the blinds and was transfixed by the sight out the window. The sky was a most stunning color pallet of reds, purples, and blues! Normally I would not even stop. However, recently, I have been contemplating what I’m doing with my life and why. I am homeschooling my children. I am trying to keep my house in working order. I am trying to run a successful business. Three worthy endeavors, any one of which should bring me fulfillment and joy, yet I felt fraught with trepidation and stress. For many months I’ve been feeling that my plate is too full. I’m not excelling in any area, I’m just getting by. I stood there, staring at the sunset, and decided it had been way too long since I’d taken a sunset photo.
I assembled my camera and framed my shots. I adjusted the exposure. I was calm and my head was clear. Focus followed. I thought about the three major contenders for my time. How much time does it take to keep the house at a “keep the kids fed and the toilets clean” level? How much time does it take to homeschool a 5th grader, Kindergartener, and a Preschooler? How much time does it take to run and grow a successful business in a market that is over saturated? Do I really need to sleep?
Needless to say, the number of hours needed exceeded the number of hours I have. By a ton. But how do I pick what to do? How do I cut back? Women all over the country are able to do all of these things without problems; what’s my deal?!??!?!? I don’t know. I do know that I want to focus more on my kids. Cook more meals at home. This year, I want to start to scrapbook again. I want to take more random photos of my family. I want to write down the funny things that my kids say (write them somewhere other than Facebook).
I love running a business. I have to keep my house decent. I feel that I am meant to homeschool my kids. Eventually, I will make all of these things work together in harmony, but for now, one of them (biz) is going to get a much smaller piece of the pie.
This year my oldest son will turn seventeen. Yesterday, he fit in the crook of my arm while I nursed him to sleep, in awe of what a perfect and tiny and beautiful creature God had sent me. Now, I have five beautiful “babies” (plus two in heaven). So quickly the moments are flying by, and I’m wasting them on stress. In a year, my camera will look the same, have the same features, take the same stunning photos that it does today. In that same year, my baby will turn from four to five. He will learn to count and to write. He will learn that he can do many things without Mommy. In a year he will be different, and I don’t want to miss those moments.
This year I will enjoy more sunsets, because they don’t last very long.
I get flowers, you get a blog post. 🙂
Everyday, I prepare lessons, teach lessons, shuffle kids, clean the house, feed the kids, and try to run a business. It is exhausting and sometimes overwhelming. At times, I feel that I just can’t do it all. (So, I stay in my PJs all day, and skip the ‘cleaning house’ part.) I think of putting the kids in public school, or closing my business. Perhaps, I tell myself, I’ll just run away. I used to be somebody. I was a manager in IT. I was accredited in my field. People would desperately run to me and ask me to fix a down server, and I would, then I’d be hailed as the hero of the day! I’d get yearly pay increases, daily praises, and constant feedback. I had three kids and I saw them twice a week and every other weekend. I lived in an overpriced duplex that I loved. I was a stone’s throw from a six figure income. I was rocking the single mom lifestyle. I was miserable.
Then I met you. You rescued me from my stable life of quiet grief. You were so direct, so honest. I had never before had a conversation with someone who had absolutely no filter. If you thought something, you said it. There was no analyzing how it was going to make me feel. What seemed to others abrasive, to me, was a great comfort. You were absolutely sure of yourself, and secure in who you were. When you told me you loved me, I knew it was true. When you asked me to marry you, I was confident that you meant it.
Yes, my life is crazy. But I am at home with my kids. I am working in my passion. I feel overwhelmingly loved by my knight. Though the shining armor is a green flight suit, and the white horse is a C-130, you are the love of my life. You made me believe in fairy tales, in romantic movies, in life. I am happy. (Crazy, but happy.) The past nine years with you, have honestly been the happiest years of my life. I feel safe, I feel loved, and I feel whole. You… complete me. 😀
